greekgogurt:

do you ever look at someone you used to be good friends with and cringe

(via heyfunniest)

selfinducedcomatose:

i always get mad at myself for not talking to people but when i talk to people i get mad at myself because i dont know how to talk to people

(Source: curbstomped, via kjakerz)

• tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
• new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
• tourist: oh you think you're clever???
• new yorker: what
• tourist: i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
• new yorker: oh... oh i'm so sor
• tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
• the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole